Stand-In
By David Rivard
Let me sleep & then waken whenever life demands.
Let the dead baker of pies advise me —
he who was murdered by robbers
from a warrior clan gone bad —
his shift was long often but swift
his crust, the sugared slices of apples
stalks of rhubarb, all of it was quick
so if he says it is for the best
let me always be in touch with my loneliness
boots touching down on snow-covered paths
the clotted snow, sleet & ice like devil’s snot
anxiety in the elementary school parking lot
a lot in darkness, tangle of
softnesses in darkness, the dark in darkness
that crow queen appearing endlessly
beside a bank of violet crocuses.
Let her always be watching me from her position
by the geriatric center —
at all times worn wild
in her affection for my shyness.
Let me mingle my feathers with hers
let my breath stir against her beak, snockered.
Elsewise I would be as pleased
to be a jar of baby food if having been eaten from & cleaned
it were filled then by the sea.
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One more by Rivard to go with the other two. I need to get one of his books. And while you're back here, gacked from
Had older son home from early this morning; hubby arrived before 9:30 and then had to do his morning phone conference from home, which was fine, then older son slept till nearly noon, woke up and drank a little lukewarm tea, at which point I discovered that we had no chicken noodle soup in the house and called hubby again to ask him to bring some home since son did not want to travel. Which is a bummer, because if I had traveled I could have deposited the two $40 rebate checks that arrived in the mail today when I was only supposed to get one. I figured it wouldn't hurt to wait a day, and then tonight I got both a phone call and e-mail from the company saying that the second check was a mistake, oops, invalid. In the meantime, I had finally also gotten the Ritz $50 gift card that was supposed to arrive a couple of weeks after my camera back in December, and since I had been in the house all day with sick older son and still-crying-every-hour younger son when he came home from school, I went out to the mall and bought the telephoto I have been coveting since I got my digital SLR. That extra $40 would have helped a lot.
In between, older son asked if we could watch Life of Brian, and how could I deny my sick child the opportunity to laugh himself silly? That is a movie that never gets old; even the opening credits never get old (the Roman Empire crumbling around religious iconography). "No one is to stone anyone until I blow this whistle!" "Do you find it wisible when I mention my fwiend Biggus Dickus?" "Yes! We are all individuals!" "Blessed is everyone who has a vested interest in the status quo!" I could go on and on and on. Evening was women's basketball, and although Maryland's men may have tanked weeks ago, the women are awesome! It's a very good year, locally.
And I'm still out of it and just no fun, stayed off IM most of the day and suspect I depressed everyone I talked to in the evening. Thanks so much everyone for the kind wishes about Aragorn; younger son in particular is still having a very hard time, and I feel like I haven't even started processing, really, since I've been dealing with the kids and their misery. I wrote three articles today (Bakula in Shenandoah, Ryan on Shark and Blalock in some movie filming in Calgary) after telling my editor I did not know if I could get any done, since son dozed morning and late afternoon and missed his extended fencing class, so maybe Tuesday I will take the camera with the new lens and the MDA to Great Falls, take some pictures and see whether I can beam an article about the decline and fall of the Star Trek franchise from the Potomac River overlook.
Speaking of Great Falls, here are some little flowers growing between the rocks of the bedrock terrace beside the bridges to the islands with the overlooks to the river and Virginia.
My horoscope for Tuesday: You are at a point of emotional climax right now. Things are coming to a critical point in which situations seem to first escalate and then suddenly collapse. Little issues in your relationships that you have failed to deal with openly are coming back to haunt you. It could be that someone is trying to cross you at this time, or maybe it just feels this way. Don't get overly paranoid. The whole world is not out to get you. Someone please remind me of this if it sounds like I need it later. *g*
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