By Gail Mazur
You're the shadow shadow lurking in me
and the lunatic light waiting in that shadow.
Ghostwriter of my half-life, intention's ambush
I can't prepare for, ruthless whammy
you have me ogling a blinding sun,
my right eye naked even with both lids closed—
glowering sun, unerring navigator
around this darkened room, you're my laser probe,
I'm your unwilling wavelength,
I can never transcend your modus operandi,
I've given up trying to outsmart you,
and the new thinking says I didn't invent you—
whatever you were to me I've outgrown,
I don't need you, but you're tenacity embodied,
tightening my skull, my temple, like plastic wrap.
Many times, I've traveled to a dry climate
that wouldn't pander to you, as if the great map
of America's deserts held the key to a pain-free future,
but you were an encroaching line in the sand,
then you were the sand. We've spent the best years
of my life intertwined: wherever I land
you entrap me in the unraveled faces
of panhandlers, their features my features—
you, little death I won't stop for, little death
luring me across your footbridge to the other side,
oblivion's anodyne. Soon—I can't know where or when—
we'll dance ache to ache again on my life's fragments,
one part abandoned, the other abundance—
--------
I have a horrible early morning doctor's appointment so I'll make this quick. I don't have a great deal to report anyway; worked on a review and various other projects, took a long walk in the afternoon since the weather was absolutely glorious (over 60 degrees, ground smelling like early spring, deer in the woods), did various chores. Had a headache, hence the poem, though by migraine standards it was pretty mild and only kept me from reading for a while since my eyes wouldn't focus. The Maryland Senate is set to vote on a bill to legalize gay marriage, which they're pretty confident has enough votes to pass, and the governor has said he'll sign it into law, so that makes me happy.
We watched $%!& My Dad Says, which ended with a cliffhanger for a change, then Piers Morgan FINALLY showed the Colin Firth/Geoffrey Rush/Helena Bonham Carter interview he's postponed 27 times for live Middle East coverage. It was worth the wait, though I am very sorry it wasn't longer since Piers asked some rather dumb questions and I feel certain that Colin, Helena, and Geoffrey would have asked each other better ones -- in fact someone should let the three of them interview each other, since Colin had laryngitis and was speaking rather slowly, and Helena was all too happy to take advantage of the chance to chat -- she said that she couldn't get a word in edgewise on the set, since Colin didn't even notice she was there when Geoffrey was around. Yay! A few more Potomac Overlook Park animals:
No comments:
Post a Comment