Beauty Secrets, Revealed by the Queen in Snow White
By Natasha Sajé
Do for your neck what you do for your face.
Face your neck whatever the case. Pace yourself
for 35-55, a quick
and bumpy ride, gone in a sneeze. Avoid
petroleum; replace with olive oil.
Check bitterness at the door; be happy!
Do for yourself what you do for others,
the money guru says to sisters. Embrace
a stash and a place, Virginia wrote, 80
years ago. Don't be dopey or sleepy,
and don't buy all that's offered. Wake up!
Do for your future what you should have done
for your past. Don't be bashful: it's one thing
to have a neck, another to stick it out.
Go ahead and eat fruit fallen to the ground;
be wary of apples in other hands.
Know the party's over when the hostess
yawns, her jaw like folds of lace. Brace yourself
for 55-85, a long
and grumpy slide. Help, Doc! Imagine lots
of green and see it when your eyes
are closed. Don't see red, as in done for,
as in broke, as in give up the chase.
Do for your head what you do for your face.
Avoid asking questions of mirrors.
To check your own sad countenance each day
is a disgrace. If you hang on, cash can help.
Despite it, the Iron Lady's now just a trace
of the woman who said, There's no such thing
as society! It's our duty to look after ourselves.
A head of state. Debased.
Wednesday was another annoying chore day. After calling twice to find out whether my new glasses were ready, I decided I should march over and find out for myself. Sadly, they were not ready, but I believe my presence operated as a kick in the butt because they promised me that I would have them by the end of the day. I went to get some other things done at the mall and ended up meeting my mother, though I'd eaten breakfast late, so we skipped lunch. Then I went to get my hair cut, stopped to get conditioner in the hope that it would make my newly cut hair look more voluminous, and received a phone call just as I was leaving from Adam, who had forgotten his key and needed to be let in the house.
When I got home, I helped Adam record sound effects for the movie version of Waiting for Godot he and classmates are making as a final AP Literature project, did more laundry (including the skirt I wore today, which a bird bombed as I was leaving Sears) though I hadn't folded Tuesday's laundry yet, and rearranged some stuff in my room to make space for a new lamp. After dinner, Adam went to work on his final school projects while we watched Nature on beavers and dams, The 100 on which all the well-developed characters are women, and Nashville so no one could spoil me for the season finale even though it meant postpone The Americans for a day. Brookside Gardens azaleas on Mother's Day: