Poem for Thursday and Autumn in Issaquah

My Arabic Is Mute
By Almog Behar
Translated by Dimi Reider

My Arabic is mute
Strangled at the throat
Cursing itself
Without uttering a word
Sleeping in the airless shelters of my soul
Hiding
From relatives
Behind the Hebrew shutters.

And my Hebrew is raging
Running among rooms and neighbours’ balconies
Making its voice heard in public
Prophesying the coming of God
and bulldozers
And then it holes up in the living room
Thinking itself so open in the language of its skin
So hidden between the pages of its flesh
A moment naked, a moment later dressed
It curls up into the armchair
And begs itself for forgiveness.

My Arabic is petrified
It quietly pretends to be Hebrew
And whispers to friends
Whenever somebody knocks at her gate
"Ahlan Ahlan, welcome"
And whenever a policeman passes it in the street
It produces an ID card
And points out the protective clause
“Ana min al-yahud, ana min al-yahud” – “I am a Jew, I am a Jew”.

And my Hebrew is deaf
Sometimes very deaf.

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Things I did on Thursday: Wiped out a USB drive to make one more attempt at reinstalling Windows on my computer (reverted to earliest version of Windows 10, keeps telling me it is missing important content and security updates, don't know yet whether it's capable of downloading and installing those). Went to a new optometrist to order new glasses because current ones have cracked frames. Stopped at World Market, got cheese and chocolate. Finally got our covid and flu shots because finally CVS did not cancel our appointments at the last minute (and picked up a prescription that OptumRX has been out of, too). 

Barely made it home in time for my Thursday night fangirl call, but it was great to see everyone. And the Phillies were winning when I got off. Cheryl and I watched Our Flag Means Death and Loki together, and I'm so frustrated that they're on the same night over the same weeks because I love both these shows so much and I wish I could spread them out longer. Some of the stuff on the former is the bravest stuff I've seen on television -- I wouldn't have had the guts to write it in fan fiction, it's so raw -- and the latter finally let Loki lean into his wicked side. Spot the fall color around the fair in Issaquah: